The longer grandma is in the hospital, the more my family's true colors show. We're being absolutely nasty to each other. This is how it always is without a mediator.

Yesterday: ACTs until 1, lunch/homework, hospital, Petco and Petsmart, crying, home, blah.

As soon as we go to the hospital, grandma started up with her tantrums. She wants to come home, apparently. "There's no reason to keep me here." Well, she was unconscious for two weeks and on a ventilator. She can't move on her own. I think it's best if she stayed there.

I've been sleeping relatively well. I haven't been taking my Ambien. But, my nightmares have been coming back. Things were pretty cool when I thought I'd been able to get rid of them. Now, I'm back to waking up screaming at no one and crying and .. whatever.

Detatchment. Hopelessness. Urges to self-injure.
I'm so fucked up right now.
Sure, it's just the stress of the situation.
But, I want to go to sleep and never have to wake up.